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0 of 3 Premium Clicks used this month SUBSCRIBE Print + Online Subscriber Activation | Register x Forgot Password | Need an Account? e-edition | subscribe | newsletter | deals Home News Latest Stories Community blog: Domestic Violence- "No More Silence" Emergency services Winters worn down by criticism Since You Asked: RCC/SOU Higher Education Center was indeed on 'Castle' Monday Oregon Action has new lead organizer Crime, Courts and Emergency Services Community blog: Domestic Violence- "No More Silence" Emergency services Winters worn down by criticism Home invasion robbery suspect who skipped town two years ago arrested in L.A. Man with long criminal history sentenced to 10 years for firearm possession Politics and Elections Winters worn down by criticism Eagle Point might get on the bus Richardson accuses Kitzhaber of 'corruption' in final debate Green Party won't back its own candidate Jobs at core of Oregon House race Education SOU student says free speech issue overblown SOU interim president leads in a different direction Medford school officials consider costs of full-day kindergarten Foundation kicks off ambitious 'Count Me In' fundraising campaign 100 hours and counting Environment Neighbors smell trouble in proposal to spread waste on Sams Valley farmland Bear cub captured in Ashland pharmacy Work begins on Southern Oregon's first dedicated mountain bike trail Applegate Dam hydroelectric project dead in water Fear of orphaned cubs nixes new spring bear hunt State news Nation - World Obituaries Ronald J. Hupp Death Notices Gary Wayne Campbell Carrol Allen Adams Dixie Alene Davis Kruggel Weather Photo Galleries Since You Asked Videos Web Cams Mail Tribune 100 Sports Latest Stories North girls edge South in cross-town battle North-South prep for Black and Blue battle Panther boys, girls qualify for state meet Rookie Randle leads Lakers past Blazers 94-86 Royals clobber Giants 7-2 to even World Series Varsity 541 College Sports Slumping Bears hope to slow No. 6 Oregon, Mariota Shaw shoulders blame for Stanford's slide As SEC rules rankings, calls of #SECBias rise Oregon inches way back into playoff race UO’s Dargan sets the tone for improving defense Pro Sports Rookie Randle leads Lakers past Blazers 94-86 Royals clobber Giants 7-2 to even World Series Manning won’t laugh at a keep-away encore Bumgarner, Giants jump all over Royals in opener On road to recovery, Marinovich finds painting Community Sports LOCAL EVENTS LOCAL RESULTS Business Latest Stories Sportsman's Warehouse to add Klamath Falls store County OKs partnership to lead business recruitment People's Bank sees 64% net earnings gain New I-5 interchange puts south Medford on fast lane to fast food County's jobless rate unchanged in September Real Estate News New I-5 interchange puts south Medford on fast lane to fast food Lithia buys Clovis dealership Rental vacancies increase Jackson County real estate sales, prices continue rebound Pallet Wine Co. expands in downtown Medford People In Business People in Business Transportation Frontier Airlines to end Eugene-Denver service Business Resource Fair has answers Erickson's Navy contract extended Lithia buys Clovis dealership Agriculture Hundreds look for work at Harry & David hiring fair Umpqua Holdings more than doubles net earnings Harry & David will hold hiring fair Thursday Ranchers offer livestock exchange 1-800-Flowers CEO: Labor shortage an issue for Harry & David Opinion Latest Our View: George Will: In Kentucky, a constitutional moment Letters to the Editor, Oct. 23 Granlund cartoon: McDonald’s profits drop Letters to the Editor, Oct. 22 Editorials Our View: Our view: Merkley-Wehby race leaves us unconvinced; Walden seems destined for permanent position Our View: Falls for sheriff, our picks for state House Our view: Endorsements include Bates, Talbert, Hoppe Reversing course: Hoppe for judge Letters to the Editor Letters to the Editor, Oct. 23 Letters to the Editor, Oct. 22 Letters to the Editor, Oct. 21 Letters to the Editor, Oct. 20 Letters to the Editor, Oct. 19 Guest Opinions Don't overlook importance of Jackson County commissioners race Measure 92 misleads rather than enlightens Oregonians have a right to know what's in their food Infill is the answer to growth issues Guest Opinion: Who’s really to blame for 2014 wildfires? Lifestyle Latest stories Marketta Gregory: Pass along a compliment Community blog: There's a method to mix, match alternative grains How to live and work in a tiny home Joan Endyke: The importance of a healthy diet when pregnant Ashland resident's cookbook showcases gluten-free creativity Food Community blog: There's a method to mix, match alternative grains Ashland resident's cookbook showcases gluten-free creativity Legder David Cellars has a new winemaker and big plans Kitchen Call: New interest in old-fashioned buttermilk Joanna McQuillan Weeks: Cheese balls deserve more respect Home and Garden How to live and work in a tiny home Dear Monty: Rent-back clause prevents financial disaster​ Recycle plastic at The Expo Friday and Saturday How to know when trees and shrubs need to go Dear Monty: Is your real estate agent a secret agent? Health Joan Endyke: The importance of a healthy diet when pregnant Community blog: Listening Skills for the Brave and Passionate: Taking it to the Next Level Held captive by whimsy Community blog: My New Best Selling Book Dr. Jeff Hersh: The enterovirus is not new Hiking Biking Faith Religion Briefs Religion Briefs Religion Briefs Religion briefs First Church of Nazarene plans cleanup Milestones and Achievements New arrivals Southern Oregon Pride parade celebrates gay marriage ruling New Arrivals Columnist for a Day Rogue Healthy Aging Tempo Latest stories Dean Angermeier rediscovers his 'roots' Medieval imagery inspires Portland artist Blog: Dark house Review: Funny 'Lion in Winter' roars to life at Camelot Theatre Yu's Yummy Yan's offers great take-out Theater Camelot presents 'The Lion in Winter' 'Carnage' is short, smart, darkly funny Music Dean Angermeier rediscovers his 'roots' Moonalice plays Applegate Lodge A cappella fellas sing for schools The Farr Side: Bryan Adams releases album of influential hits Tutunov Piano Series begins at SOU Community Events Review: Funny 'Lion in Winter' roars to life at Camelot Theatre Theater's haunted house not for faint of heart Third Fridays in downtown Medford Works in progress Southern Oregon Pride Festival celebrates diversity Dining Yu's Yummy Yan's offers great take-out Agave offers tasty tacos Asian cuisine for all seasons at Misoya Bistro Spoons Tempo Videos Classifieds Jobs Autos Real Estate FEATURED » Obituaries Blogs TV Listings Movie Listings Oregon Outdoors Oregon Healthy Living Magazines & Special Sections NEWS NOW Winters worn down by criticism ... Our View: ... Winters calls elections allegations 'slanderous' ... Winters worn down by criticism ... Our View: ... Winters calls elections allegations 'slanderous' ... Far from the twisted reach of crazy sorrow Alas, poor Cover Oregon! We knew it, HTTP 503. By Robert Galvin MailTribune.com By Robert Galvin Posted Apr. 27, 2014 @ 12:01 am Updated Apr 27, 2014 at 2:35 AM By Robert Galvin Posted Apr. 27, 2014 @ 12:01 am Updated Apr 27, 2014 at 2:35 AM » Social News Alas, poor Cover Oregon! We knew it, HTTP 503. Stumbling deep in the woods like Pelinore, our once and not-so-future health care exchange's fate has been determined by the death panel. Cover Oregon eventually will be stuffed into a plastic bag and banished to the foggy ruins of time, not a goshawk or gubernatorial reprieve in sight. Now comes the fun part, as smack in the middle of the midterms everyone will be ready, willing and able to offer their 27,800,000,000 cents worth about what went wrong, who's at fault, and why those people shouldn't be allowed to make any more decisions. At least they'll be talking, as opposed to those whose immediate reaction in the face of the embarrassment was to spin, turn tail, lick their wounds and become harder to find than a cat that doesn't want its claw nails clipped. Cover Oregon hangs there like a big ol' piñata during this election year, as politicians who want to rise to power attempt to persuade you — even those who don't have insurance — that politicians have no business control over anything as intricate as a website. So, what are politicians qualified to do? No, really, I'm asking. Big help you are this morning. Let's see, well, politicians might be second only to deodorant companies in convincing us that we must have things that we don't really need. There's a Democrat from Maryland who has introduced a bill in the U.S. House of Representatives called the Apollo Lunar Landing Legacy Act. This particular piece of legislation would not just recognize this year's 45th anniversary of Apollo 11's landing on a New Mexico soundstage "¦ it also calls for the establishment of a national park. On the moon. The reasoning (yeah, that's a stretch) goes that if Merrca has a national park on the moon, then other nations or even Nevada ranchers can't go up there and stampede our property — because, you know, we "own" the moon in the same way we claimed the New World when we became the first humans to take one small step here. The Apollo Lunacy "¦ Lunar Legacy Act has made as much progress in Congress as the Read the Bill Act, an endeavor by a Republican from Kentucky that would force our duly elected public servants to "¦ well, you're smart people. There are several provisions written into the Read the Bull "¦ Bill Act. That is, apparently there are, according to those who claim to have read it "¦ which might be why it has yet to make its way out of committee. Note to self: See, committees actually work when they don't take action. Closer to home, Ashland has decided to ban the commercial use of plastic bags "¦ except, of course, those that fall into one of the several exempted categories. And, well, those we buy ourselves in stores. Stores can sell you a box of plastic bags, but they can't give you one to put the box in to take home. The thinking (lather, rinse, repeat) goes that if plastic bags become a crime, only criminals will have plastic bags. Outside of the exempted categories, I myself use plastic bags for only two things — bringing my lunch to work and carrying cat litter to the Dumpster. These are pretty harmless tasks, except for the one time I got them backwards. (Hope the Dumpster divers enjoyed the creamed chicken with broccoli and spinach noodles.) Plastic bags are a nuisance environmentally; well, at least according to scientists, and, honestly, who trusts them? Apparently not us goshawk-fearing Merrcans, The Associated Press reported last week that while a vast majority of we the people now believe smoking causes cancers, other widely viewed scientific theories don't pass the sniff test. "Americans have more skepticism than confidence in global warming, the age of the Earth and evolution," the AP reported, "and have the most trouble believing a Big Bang created the universe 13.8 billion years ago." BAZINGA! Scientists, of course, were mortified by the lack of faith in what they perceive to be scientific facts. And while those interviewed say they realize their third-place standing in what one called the "iron triangle of faith, politics and science," there's seemingly little that can be done to persuade attitudes like those of the 39-year-old architect from New Jersey who had a succinct answer as to why he can't fully believe the notion that the Earth began forming some 4.5 billion years ago. Why is he skeptical? "I wasn't there," he said. The human mind can only stand so much, especially if all the truth in the world adds up to one big lie. Things have changed. "Science can purify religion from error and superstition," said Pope John Paul II, who is to be canonized today. "Religion can purify science from idolatry and false absolutes." And not all scientists are glum these days. Just this past week they announced the discovery that if you throw a gecko at a Teflon pan, the lizard (who hopefully had insurance) will stick to the non-stick surface. And that the brains of ravens can tell the difference between rocks and food. And that, if you purposely inflict pain upon a female laboratory rat, she doesn't give a patootie that her male partner wants her booty. There also was a study about how some people have a genetic predisposition toward procrastination, but I haven't gotten around "¦ well, you're smart people. To top it off, it was revealed that cats understand more of what we're saying to them than they let on, they just don't care to acknowledge us "¦ unless, of course, there are spinach noodles in their litter box. It's times such as these when we all feel a bit like the Marshall Islands, constantly bombarded from all sides until finally having had enough. The island nation, site of 67 nuclear-weapons tests over a 12-year period, this week filed suit against the U.S. and eight other nuclear powers for "flagrant violations of international law." Merrca had no comment; too busy gearing up to welcome the tired, the poor, the huddled masses of Cover Oregon refugees. "Stupidity is also a gift of God," John Paul II reminded us, " but one mustn't misuse it." No wonder the guy's a saint. Mail Tribune news editor Robert Galvin can be reached at [email protected] By Robert Galvin MailTribune.com By Robert Galvin Posted Apr. 27, 2014 @ 12:01 am Updated Apr 27, 2014 at 2:35 AM » Comment or view comments Reader Reaction » STAY INFORMED Email NewsLetter Sign Up Today Sign up for our newsletter and have the top headlines from your community delivered right to your inbox. calendar Connect with MailTribune.com Facebook Twitter RSS Back to top Reader Services Reader Services Home Subscriptions Subscriber controls Contact us Submissions Photos Events Letters to the editor Corrections Announcements Obituaries Story ideas Since you asked Alerts Email Alerts RSS Feeds Text Alerts Advertise Media Kit Home Products and services Ad rates Advertising contacts Mail Tribune Daily Tidings The Nickel Shop Our Valley Blogs Stay Informed Email newsletter Sign Up Today Sign up for our newsletter and have the top headlines from your community delivered right to your inbox. 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