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Southern Oregon Journal: Christmas Eve: A time to look back and start shopping Sunday Dec 24, 2017 at 12:01 AM By Peggy Dover for the Mail Tribune This will be our first Christmas without Uncle Dick, but not the life and humor he brought to the table. Certain people seem to pack more gusto into their days. He was one of those. He was also king of the last-minute shoppers. Uncle D waited until the very last to fulfill his gifting duties and admitted it each year with a smugness born of experience. I consider his prowess my hope when three days remain and I begin to fret over a crisis of stocking stuffers. Visions of half-deflated stockings tiptoe through nightmares along with my daughter’s look of disappointment mixed with grace. She’s a stocking half-full kind of gal. And, yes, we both still hang up our stockings. Santa is a benevolent old soul. I recall one year vividly. She and our son-in-law were on route from Portland, and the sock situation lay pathetic. I made a mad dash into Rite Aid, counting on them for the largest collection of smallish, useful items. If all else failed, I could stuff the toes with cotton balls. A bottle of Mylanta would take up a lot of room. Plus, there was no crowd. I hate to admit to the panicky fervor to which I succumbed, as I’m pretty sure I included a drain de-clogger (long and skinny). Hey, who couldn’t use one, but yeah. Stocking stuffers have changed, though. My siblings and I could always count on a big, red apple ( I consider fruit having abided the night inside a Christmas sock to be particularly healthful), an orange and a scattering of candy and unshelled nuts to bring up the finale to a sock piled with playing cards, a hairbrush and coloring books. We loved it. But expectations have gone through the chimney, and we have advertisers to blame. They skillfully lay shame to our eyelash curlers and nail polish remover, instead having us believe that other, better people, who are more capable of showing their love, tuck diamonds inside their loved ones stockings. Don’t buy it. That rarely happens, and mostly on the Hallmark Channel, which is all pure fabrication. The characters are really inflatables (see column from two weeks prior). Like his older brother, my dad also shopped at the last, or rather, Mom did the running around, while he occupied a mall bench and watched people. He loved ornate decorations and when stores put up holiday displays. He was particularly adept at picking out the panicky faces among the crowd. Those poor wretches who waited too long to find a Star Wars droid, for instance. Sometimes I sat with him and helped in the hunt. I miss those days. It seems every year someone new is missing from the party. I know there are many who dread or endure the holidays because of losses and shadows of times past. I fade in and out of being joyful one day and melancholy the next. Christmas is a fragile and beautiful time when glad tidings and regrets orbit nearest one another, and every trigger seems to arrive with bells on. But this is Christmas Eve, and the child inside trusts the hope and anticipation that accompanies this night. A hope for all ills healed and anticipation of a new world. It’s not too much to expect. To all who may be hurting or missing someone this holiday, take heart. You are not alone. For each empty chair, others are filling with those who need us to replicate the good times and give them something positive to remember. May your day be authentic and bright, and may all your memories delight. — Peggy Dover is a freelance writer living in Eagle Point. Email her at [email protected]. She loves to hear from readers.