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0 of 3 Premium Clicks used this month SUBSCRIBE Print + Online Subscriber Activation | Register x Forgot Password | Need an Account? subscribe | newsletter | deals Home News Latest Stories Medford woman killed in Highway 140 motorcycle crash Seven tasks that help prevent hospital readmissions Ashland's ScienceWorks Hands-On Museum to double classroom space New Southern Oregon University board votes to bump tuition nearly 5 percent in the fall Police Reports Education New Southern Oregon University board votes to bump tuition nearly 5 percent in the fall Why OLLI matters: A personal perspective Southern Oregon University names director of marketing Dianne Williamson: College admissions mania ill-advised Rotary Club of Ashland names Riley O'Sullivan as Student of the Month Environment Mt. Ashland Ski Area to host party March 28 Mt. Ashland hopes coming storm will reopen ski area Wild Side: Selfish and other reasons for saving endangered species Mt. Ashland Ski Area: Low snow closes 'bunny hill' chairlift for beginning skiers With pre-season conditions worst in 25 years, catastrophic wildfires expected in region this summer Business Ride & Drive: 2015 Land Rover Range Rover Evoque Snow hopes dashed, Mt. Ashland Ski Area hosts season-ending party Saturday Iconic Ashland bookstore to celebrate 35th anniversary on April 19 Test Drive: 2015 Honda Accord Cars We Remember: The original Candymatic Ramchargers Politics and elections Jackson County Commissioners plan no tax on marijuana for first year Grassroots group campaigns for Plaza paver do-over Arthur I. Cyr: Iran – a crisis without end Short-term rental restrictions kept in some areas, loosened in others Arthur I. Cyr: South Korea represents long-term triumph – for them and for US State News Oregon's governor appoints new secretary of state Nation - World Obituaries Death Notices Alicia Applegate Hardy Death Notices Rosalind Dee Death Notices Shareable Sports Latest Stories Grizz baseball team caps Arizona trip with another win Ashland Rowing Club hires highly touted coach and national-award winning team director to lead expansion Antionette Kerr: Tourney fever gets superstitious Blazers fight back, edge Jazz Grizzlies rally past Colorado school for Greenway Festival victory High school Grizz baseball team caps Arizona trip with another win Grizzlies rally past Colorado school for Greenway Festival victory Ashland softball team splits pair in second day of Bend tournament Grizzlies rally past GP, to 2-0 start Ashland boys capture another Sato Cup snowboard title at Mt. Bachelor Southern Oregon University Grizz baseball team caps Arizona trip with another win Grizzlies rally past Colorado school for Greenway Festival victory Ashland softball team splits pair in second day of Bend tournament Ducks enjoy the challenge Oregon bows out Voices Latest Stories Letters to the Editor, March 30 Chris Honoré: Some political and social observations Guest Opinion: Ashland council vote on travelers accommodations was less than transparent Herb Rothschild Jr: Failing at charity Philip Maddocks: GOP plan offers hope for poor once they become rich Editorial Our View: Build it; they will play Our View: How it should work Our View: Ashland High principal is the head of her class Our View: Tuition trauma Our View: SOU's economic clout Letters Letters to the Editor, March 30 Letters to the Editor, March 27 Letters to the Editor, March 25 Letters to the Editor, March 23 Letters to the Editor, March 20 Guest opinions Guest Opinion: Ashland council vote on travelers accommodations was less than transparent Guest Opinion: Hannah Thomas-Garner's father thanks the Ashland community Guest Opinion: Ashland is asking for trouble with new room rental rules Guest Opinion: More reasons to oppose Jordan Cove Guest Opinion: It's Groundwater Awareness Week; test your well Columns Chris Honoré: Some political and social observations Guest Opinion: Ashland council vote on travelers accommodations was less than transparent Herb Rothschild Jr: Failing at charity Philip Maddocks: GOP plan offers hope for poor once they become rich Matthew T. Mangino: A clearer picture of police shootings begins to emerge Chris Honore Council Corner Editor's Notes Jeffrey Gillespie Herb Rothschild Revels Latest Stories Top 5 things to do this week Laurie Lewis and Kathy Kallick pay tribute to Arkansas bluegrass duo Vern Williams and Ray Park The Oregon Shakespeare Festival presents Eugene O'Neill's autobiographical 'Long Day's Journey into Night' Community blog: Words, wine and Craig Wright 4 Things To Do This Week Theater Review: From past into present in OSF's 'Long Day's Journey' Ticket availability Ticket Availability Ashland Contemporary Theatre seeks new artistic director Ticket Availability Music Futureshock: Kendrick Lamar release points to road ahead Laurie Lewis and Kathy Kallick pay tribute to Arkansas bluegrass duo Vern Williams and Ray Park Album reviews: Recent and recommended for March The Farr Side: New format for ‘American Idol’ as show continues a strong run Improv rock and folk band hosts a dance party at the Ashland Community Center Visual Art Ashland's First Friday Art Walk showcases new exhiits by regional artists Movies Movie review: In ‘Danny Collins,’ Pacino helps us imagine a Lennon story Noah Baumbach talks Ben Stiller, adult comedies and more In 'Timbuktu,' lust for power disturbs peace Movie review: ‘The Gunman’ misses the target Movie listings: March 20-26 Food and Drink Cruelest Month: Poetry Blog Lifestyle Latest Stories Seven tasks that help prevent hospital readmissions Review: From past into present in OSF's 'Long Day's Journey' Community Blog: What is Peace? Ride & Drive: 2015 Land Rover Range Rover Evoque App Finder: Best barbecue apps Aging Happens Inner Peace Column Inner Peace Blog Rogues: Tales from the Valley Classifieds Jobs Autos Real Estate FEATURED » Obituaries Photos Videos Blogs Business Business Services NEWS NOW Medford woman killed in Highway 140 motorcycle crash ... Seven tasks that help prevent hospital readmissions ... Chris Honoré: Some political and social observations ... Medford woman killed in Highway 140 motorcycle crash ... Seven tasks that help prevent hospital readmissions ... Chris Honoré: Some political and social observations ... Wry & Ginger: Cable news of future a different breed Comment By Sid McKeen More Content Now DailyTidings.com By Sid McKeen More Content Now Posted Mar. 9, 2015 at 9:19 AM By Sid McKeen More Content Now Posted Mar. 9, 2015 at 9:19 AM » Social News Care to hear my prediction for the Next Big Thing in the world of cable television news, with its insatiable appetite for keeping viewers entertained around the clock? OK, here it is: network-owned animal farms. Remember, you heard it here first. Why would the networks want to invest in their own little zoos? Stand by, as they say on air, and I’ll tell you right after this message from our sponsors. On second thought, forget the commercial break, let’s get right to it now — an invitation you’re not likely to get on the tube anytime soon. Say you’re an executive in charge of news at one of the handful of cable news outlets. Your job is to see that your network keeps up with what’s going down all over the globe, minute by minute. And if nothing is happening of note — often the case — to keep a supply of talking heads at the ready to chatter about what happened 20 minutes ago or may happen tomorrow. No easy task, keeping all those balls bouncing. Enter the network-owned animal farms. These would exist in all the major markets and be stocked 24 hours a day with an assortment of playful monkeys, cub bears, pandas, zebras, kangaroos, ostriches, penguins, peacocks and other colorful and generally less ferocious species of animal life. And — oh yes — llamas. It’s important we not forget llamas because it was two of that genus that got me to thinking about this new approach to cable news. It was one of your more-or-less typical afternoons. Savage beheadings in the Middle East. Russian soldiers sacking Ukraine. Severe strains in the Israeli-American alliance. Superbugs threatening new pandemics. Enter two llamas in Sun City, Arizona, trucked earlier to a retirement center to entertain senior citizens. One black, one white. Suddenly they bolted free and ran pell-mell through city streets for an hour while would-be captors tried to rescue them with ropes. Within minutes, cable TV networks were all over the breaking “news’” beaming play-by-play across the dial, and social media flipped out from coast to coast, with 700 tweets a minute blazing across the internet. YouTube quickly set the whole thing to music — Rossini’s William Tell Overture, more familiarly known as the Lone Ranger’s theme song. CNN went so far as to bring a llama into its newsroom for a live tongue-in-cheek interview. It was the story of the day, the week and possibly the month. Now, if a pair of salt-and-pepper llamas can generate that kind of fervor — sweeping holy wars, pestilence and end-of-the-world prophecies right off the screens — what’s to stop the broadcast media and bloggers from faking future stories involving other of God’s creatures ? With their own animal farms to supply the content, the news honchos at Fox, CNN and MSNBC could fill up their programming on slow news days by opening the gates and setting their livestock free to roam at random through the countryside, piling up unheard-of ratings. And if that proves a success, they could consider establishing their own nurseries to feature real babies in cutefests guaranteed to draw millions of viewers. Anything that gets us off the horrible news fare we’ve been enduring should be welcome. And we’re looking another presidential election campaign in the face already. Bring on the kiddies and kangaroos. Sid McKeen is a columnist for The Worcester (Mass.) Telegram & Gazette. He can be reached at [email protected]. By Sid McKeen More Content Now DailyTidings.com By Sid McKeen More Content Now Posted Mar. 9, 2015 at 9:19 AM » Comment or view comments Reader Reaction » STAY INFORMED Email NewsLetter Sign Up Today Sign up for our newsletter and have the top headlines from your community delivered right to your inbox. calendar Connect with DailyTidings.com Facebook Twitter RSS Back to top Reader Services Reader Services home Subscriptions Subscriber controls Contact us Submissions Photos Events Letters to the editor Corrections Alerts Email alerts RSS feeds Text Alerts Advertise Media Kit Home Products and services Ad rates Advertising contacts Mail Tribune Daily Tidings The Nickel Shop Our Valley Blogs Stay Informed Email newsletter Sign Up Today Sign up for our newsletter and have the top headlines from your community delivered right to your inbox. Your privacy is important, read our privacy policy. © Copyright 2015 Local Media Group, Inc. All Rights Reserved. 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