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Healthy Aging: Laughing about ways 'to not act old' Sunday Mar 5, 2017 at 12:01 AM By Sharon Johnson for the Mail Tribune While in a local grocery store recently, the friendly clerk initiated a conversation about aging. I was prompted to engage because of his clever way of finding out if I was eligible for the senior discount. He made it sound like some sort of award. I just liked the fact he asked. This clerk had an easy laugh and a wide smile. As we chatted, I began to think I’d misjudged his age. At the outset of our conversation, I thought he was in his mid-60s, but he seemed to get younger as we chatted. The happy-faced man said he was always trying to come up with ways to “not act old.” The woman in line behind me heard us and commented, “When I look in the mirror lately, I ask myself, 'Who is that person?' ” The woman behind her said, “I just try to avoid mirrors.” I think everyone in the line that day left the store in a more positive mood. I know I did. I exited the store smiling with multiple bags of groceries (not heavily overfilled, as sometimes happens). I felt better, not younger, but somehow “lighter.” I’ve been thinking about that conversation ever since and have concluded that aging successfully has something to do with not taking yourself too seriously. I recalled a book I read years ago, “How Not to Act Old” by Pamela Redmond Satran. There was one suggestion about wearing a watch, “A naked wrist is now as emblematic of youth as a perky butt.” I’m not sure I think that’s entirely true, but I did wear my watch less frequently for a while. That same author also suggested: Do not tell any stories about things that happened more than eight years prior; and do not feel compelled to send birthday and thank-you cards, which definitely lets me off the hook when I forget. This particular book seems to focus on eliminating actions that position aging adults less attractively with the younger generation. For instance, it suggested I stop asking my teenage granddaughters questions such as, “How’s school?” or “Are you doing something fun this summer?” I’m not sure what I should say instead — maybe something about soy lattes? The author also advises older adults not to be overly cheery around teenagers. I believe that to be the default position for most adults when they feel uncomfortable about what to say to adolescents, so there’s definitely work to do there, but maybe that’s just me. There are blogs and articles by the same author about “not acting old,” including “160 Ways” to avoid it. My favorite is, “Don’t dress up. Do not feel the obligation to look tidy, freshly laundered and pulled together.” To which one could add, “But don’t go to the store with soup stains on your shirt.” I’m not entirely sure about the advice from books and blogs on this topic but, as did my grocery store experience, the suggestions definitely make me laugh — long and hard sometimes. And at the risk of seeming too cheery, that’s a good thing. — Sharon Johnson is a retired Oregon State University associate professor. Reach her at [email protected].