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0 of 3 Premium Clicks used this month SUBSCRIBE Print + Online Subscriber Activation | Register x Forgot Password | Need an Account? e-edition | subscribe | newsletter | deals Home News Latest Stories Emergency services Dog show highlighted by $10,000 donation toward sheriff's K-9 Land in limbo Since You Asked: Cut to the chase on sidewalk cuts Emergency services Crime, Courts and Emergency Services Emergency services Emergency services VIDEO: Wrap Up: Oct. 31, 2014 Elder abuse consistent in stats, but underreported, officials say First GP police fatal shooting justified, DA says Politics and Elections Election equipment fails, delaying ballot counting Unrest from the ranks? Blue corn seeds stir debate Ads attack Dotterrer and Bates Local gas prices lowest in years Education Marketta Gregory: Stretch yourself for God Medford Schools Foundation supports programs the district can't Fire marshal visit prompts cancellation of Sacred Heart haunted house Kids Unlimited Academy awarded $450,000 grant County helps fund RCC job training Environment Local gas prices lowest in years Where do all those leaves go? Ashland council calls for divestment from fossil fuel Reintroduction of McCloud River salmon inspires film, tribe Rite Aid bear cub may be released into the wild in spring State News Kitzhaber embattled as he seeks fourth term Nation - World Obituaries Beulah (Butch) Johnson Robert D. Baehr Death Notices Erma Lu Cauthon Jean Camille Rector Weather Photo Galleries Since You Asked Videos Web Cams Mail Tribune 100 Sports Latest Stories Takeaways spur SOU to victory over Bears Forest Grove stuns South Medford in sudden death State cross country results Perry, Pernice move into Schwab lead Turnover helps Sheldon pull off victory over North Medford Varsity 541 College Sports Takeaways spur SOU to victory over Bears Embattled Michigan athletic director steps down SOU spoils Yotes' bid for ninth straight title Cal visits Oregon State with both teams struggling Oregon looks to break Stanford’s streak Pro Sports Perry, Pernice move into Schwab lead Gay leads Kings past Trail Blazers Cubs hire Maddon as manager, fire Renteria Hurley repeats 67, leads by two in CIMB Knicks spoil James’ homecoming Community Sports Results / Standings LOCAL EVENTS LOCAL RESULTS Business Latest Stories This Bud is for old friends Lithia reports $34.5 million third-quarter profit Blog: Trick or Treat! UO report shows Rogue Valley economy on the rise Will TV makeover do the trick for Mystic Treats? Real Estate News New I-5 interchange puts south Medford on fast lane to fast food Lithia buys Clovis dealership Rental vacancies increase Jackson County real estate sales, prices continue rebound Pallet Wine Co. expands in downtown Medford People In Business People in Business Transportation Lithia reports $34.5 million third-quarter profit Frontier Airlines to end Eugene-Denver service Business Resource Fair has answers Erickson's Navy contract extended Lithia buys Clovis dealership Agriculture Revenue rises for Harry & David's parent company Where do all those leaves go? Hundreds look for work at Harry & David hiring fair Umpqua Holdings more than doubles net earnings Harry & David will hold hiring fair Thursday Opinion Latest Letters to the Editor, Nov. 1 Granlund cartoon: Election winners Frank Talk: Power to the people Philip Maddocks: Unapologetic Christie frees God from Ebola quarantine Michelle Teheux: My opponent is worse than I am Editorials Our View: Dark money leaves candidates in dark Our View: Cheers and jeers Our View: Any new gas tax must be equitable Southeast center offers new approach to growth Our View: Cost is a poor excuse for local pot tax Letters to the Editor Letters to the Editor, Nov. 1 Letters to the Editor, Oct. 30 Letters to the Editor, Oct. 29 Letters to the Editor, Oct. 28 Letters to the Editor, Oct. 27 Guest Opinions Measure 89 provides equality for women Eagle Point needs public transportation Guest Opinion: Common Core testing sets math students up for failure Guest Opinion: Campaigning and voting 'the Oregon way' Guest Opinion: A glimpse into the reality of our elections Lifestyle Latest stories Ashland parade showcases costumed creativity Woman hospitalized in Milwaukie for Ebola testing Fishing Report: Friday, Oct. 31 Lloyd Garver: Let the dogs out Frank Talk: Power to the people Food Spices of Autumn Community blog: Seven spooky snacks are savory Halloween fare Can’t get enough pumpkin-pie spice? Living and cooking in pear-a-dise Kitchen Call: A cookbook by its cover Home and Garden 17 things you never knew about turkeys Dear Monty: 10 tips toward a quality offer on a home How to live and work in a tiny home Dear Monty: Rent-back clause prevents financial disaster​ Recycle plastic at The Expo Friday and Saturday Health Woman hospitalized in Milwaukie for Ebola testing Health Watch: Making smart fitness goals Dr. Murray Feingold: Can shingles be prevented? Dr. Jeff Hersh: What causes a canker sore? Community blog: Finding My Roots Hiking Biking Faith Religion news: Mormon church acknowledges founder’s teen bride Marketta Gregory: Stretch yourself for God Religion Briefs Religion Briefs Religion Briefs Milestones and Achievements Dog show highlighted by $10,000 donation toward sheriff's K-9 Since You Asked: Gull species found inland Ashlanders root for Guthrie in Game 7 Guide promotes better food system Where do all those leaves go? Columnist for a Day Rogue Healthy Aging Tempo Latest stories Rain damage closes Darkwing Manor 'Glee' star to perform Medford concert Singer and songwriter Gene Burnett follows his bliss Spookadelic Halloween Funktacular promises a lively dance party Patty Griffin plays the Historic Ashland Armory Theater Review: Funny 'Lion in Winter' roars to life at Camelot Theatre Camelot presents 'The Lion in Winter' 'Carnage' is short, smart, darkly funny Music 'Glee' star to perform Medford concert The Farr Side: On ‘1989,’ Taylor Swift lightens up Singer and songwriter Gene Burnett follows his bliss Patty Griffin plays the Historic Ashland Armory Live Music in Local Clubs Community Events Spookadelic Halloween Funktacular promises a lively dance party Puss 'N' Boots Costume Ball and Auction Theater's haunted house not for faint of heart Third Fridays in downtown Medford Works in progress Dining Blue Toba is a cultural experience Back Porch Bar & Grill Yu's Yummy Yan's offers great take-out Agave offers tasty tacos Asian cuisine for all seasons at Misoya Bistro Tempo Videos Classifieds Jobs Autos Real Estate FEATURED » Obituaries Blogs TV Listings Movie Listings Oregon Outdoors Oregon Healthy Living Magazines & Special Sections NEWS NOW Rain damage closes Darkwing Manor ... Woman hospitalized in Milwaukie for Ebola testing ... Donor helps Mt. Ashland buy new ski boots ... Rain damage closes Darkwing Manor ... Woman hospitalized in Milwaukie for Ebola testing ... Donor helps Mt. Ashland buy new ski boots ... Lloyd Garver: Let the dogs out By Lloyd Garver MailTribune.com By Lloyd Garver Posted Oct. 31, 2014 @ 1:18 pm By Lloyd Garver Posted Oct. 31, 2014 @ 1:18 pm GHNS » Social News You are probably aware that last week two members of the Secret Service’s K-9 unit thwarted a would-be White House intruder. Considering all of the recent bungling by the Secret Service and the understandable bad publicity that went along with it, the Service was thrilled that these K-9 Secret Service members were successful. Unfortunately, they were so thrilled that they created an enormous breach of security for the dogs involved. Not only did they make the foolish mistake of giving out the dogs’ names — Jordan and Hurricane — but they committed the big no-no of publishing photographs of these heroic agents. (The pictures, by the way, were published on Twitter. If anyone can tell me why the Secret Service has a Twitter account, I’d love to hear from you). Since making the blunder of identifying the dogs, the Secret Service has been wise enough to avoid publishing whether these had to go into hiding, and if so, where they are now relocated. However, I’m sure TMZ has its people following a telltale trail of Alpo. Patriotic pups are nothing new in the United States. In fact, one of these Belgian Malinois accompanied members of the Navy SEALs on the historic raid on Osama bin Laden. These dogs are quick learners, and obviously much cheaper to train and feed than their human counterparts. Originally, they were used almost exclusively to sniff out bombs, but as people became more aware of their skills, they've been given other jobs. Their success started me wondering if their talents could be used elsewhere in government. Just think if all of the Senate and House members were replaced by dogs. I know it might seem a tad preposterous at first, but stay with me. Some people might say that it’s silly to think that a bunch of dogs could accomplish anything significant in Congress, but when was the last time human legislators did that? Doubters could point out that some dogs will just howl all night long. They might, just like a filibuster. Another very reasonable question could be, “You have to be practical. Who's going to clean up after all of those dogs?” The answer is: “The same people who always clean up after Congress — the American taxpayers.” An all-dog Congress would be much more inclusive than the present one. Every breed of dogs, all colors and backgrounds would be equally welcome. K-9 congresspeople would not take advantage of their position by using all kinds of perks. A dog doesn’t care if he flies first class on a junket to Paris. He's happy if you give him a tennis ball. Dogs are known for their loyalty, so they would be committed to their owners who sent them to Washington, not to some rich favor seekers they never even met. If you are worried about these dogs slobbering all over the place, once again I refer you to the current members of Congress. OK, OK. I got carried away. Obviously, it’s ludicrous to think that 535 dogs could be trained to take the place of our human Congress. Then again, we’d need only You may send your comments to Lloyd Garver at [email protected] Mr. Garver has written for many TV shows, ranging from “Sesame Street” to “Family Ties” to “Home Improvement” to “Frasier.” He has also written for publications such as Newsweek, TV Guide and The Denver Post. He has just finished a new book, and will be returning it to the library tomorrow. By Lloyd Garver MailTribune.com By Lloyd Garver Posted Oct. 31, 2014 @ 1:18 pm » Comment or view comments Reader Reaction » STAY INFORMED Email NewsLetter Sign Up Today Sign up for our newsletter and have the top headlines from your community delivered right to your inbox. calendar Connect with MailTribune.com Facebook Twitter RSS Back to top Reader Services Reader Services Home Subscriptions Subscriber controls Contact us Submissions Photos Events Letters to the editor Corrections Announcements Obituaries Story ideas Since you asked Alerts Email Alerts RSS Feeds Text Alerts Advertise Media Kit Home Products and services Ad rates Advertising contacts Mail Tribune Daily Tidings The Nickel Shop Our Valley Blogs Stay Informed Email newsletter Sign Up Today Sign up for our newsletter and have the top headlines from your community delivered right to your inbox. 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