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SATURDAY December 6, 2003 - Subscribe - Contact Us Valley&State Backpage O&E Sports Archives Classifieds Faith&Beliefs Obituaries Revels November 19, 2003 Bathroom boredom no more By Tim Bousquet Tidings Correspondent "Uncle John's Bathroom Reader" publisher Gordon Javna strives to make potty time more fun. Denise Baratta | Ashland Daily Tidings "I'm an information junkie," says Gordon Javna. "I love minutia. Some people say this is useless trivia, but it's neither useless nor trivial. People love to read this stuff." Javna is publisher of "Uncle John's Bathroom Reader," the Ashland-produced publication that promises to "wipe away bathroom boredom." The Bathroom Readers Institute (BRI) just finished producing the 16th edition of the book, the 500-page "Uncle John's Unstoppable Bathroom Reader," which will be in bookstores nationwide by the end of the month. "We specialize in forgotten histories, unknown origins, and the weird beginning of things," he says. "There's always something to learn. And half the time I'm laughing at what I'm reading." Javna's brother John Javna started the Bathroom Reader series in 1988 in Berkeley but soon moved the operation to Ashland. "He just wanted to move to a better place," explains Javna. "The franchise became kind of tired by the third edition, so I took it over to give it new life." Advanced Marketing Services, Inc. purchased the company in 2000 for an undisclosed amount, but maintains a hands-off policy towards the Ashland operation, Javna says. BRI is an unpretentious affair tucked into a weathered house in the railroad district. "We're usually here by 10 a.m.," reads a small sign tacked to the front door, a relaxed attitude that continues throughout the building. Computers and stacks of papers overwhelm desks, and "bathroom art" adorns the walls. Porter, a Portuguese water dog, roams the hallways, occasionally sniffing visitors and hitting the boss up for hidden treats. A shelf in Javna's upstairs office holds a couple of dozen toy toilets and "fart putty" sits on his desk. The room is well stocked with books and magazines picked up at yard sales and second-hand stores. "Information is discarded in our society," he says. "We save it and put it in our books." But while the atmosphere is casual, a prodigious amount of work gets done at BRI. Depending on the time of year, there are six to eight employees working on the publication, doing every aspect of production besides the actual printing, which is done in the Midwest. Javna believes that BRI is the largest publisher in southern Oregon. The work appears to be paying off, as the publication continues to grow, becoming something of a cult with bathroom users around the world. "I honestly don't know how many we sell," says Javna. "Hundreds of thousands." Javna pulls out a list of stories he has culled from the book for use on an upcoming radio station tour and rattles off some of the gems: o Dumb crooks. "There was the woman who used stolen credit cards to buy family portraits. And the Virginia math teacher who was stopped by the cops and had 13 bags of crack cocaine in his car. He said 'I don't know where they came from, someone just threw them in the car when I was driving down the street. They came right through the window.'" o Weird-Mart. "You wouldn't believe some of the things we found. The best is the Invisible Jim action figure. Some lady bought it and then called the company and said 'you forgot to put the figure in the box.'" o Founding fathers. "We have a whole section on the names of companies. You know Birkenstocks? Birkenstocks is an old shoe-making family in Germany, and the great grandson of the founder made the sandal we all know now. And Casio: that started when the four Casio brothers invented a gearless calculator." o Hoaxes. "We have a section on Joey Skaggs, the famous hoaxster. He put an ad in a newspaper for a bordello for dogs, calling it the 'cathouse for dogs." Then he advertised himself as a 'psychic attorney.' He would sue people for what they did in their past lives to you in your past lives." o Mike the Headless Chicken. "One day in 1945 Lloyd Olsen went out to kill a rooster for dinner. He cut the head off and it kept running around, and it was running around for so long that Lloyd just let it go. It was still running around the next morning, and Lloyd started to feed it by sticking an eye dropper down its throat. Mike lived for 18 months without a head, and Life magazine did a whole spread on him. Now the town of Fruita, Colorado has a statue for Mike and an annual festival in his honor. Other sections include articles on conspiracy theories, how to cook a porcupine, the history of trading stamps and the Paul Bunyan trees. Plenty to keep bathroom readers of all stripes busy. "But you don't have to read it in the bathroom," says Javna. "Some people say it's not good to read in the bathroom. They say it's unsanitary. Do your business and get out. Those people can read it anywhere they want." DailyTidings.com Home Page Valley&State | Backpage | O&E | Sports | Archives | Weather | Classifieds Columnists | Faith&Beliefs | Obituaries | Revels | Subscribe | Contact Us Copyright 2003 Ashland Daily Tidings and Ottaway Newspapers All Rights Reserved Site Search: .:Advertisements:. RESOURCES - Road Cams