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--> --> The Great Limburger Cheese War, Part II By Jeff Cheek Last week's column covered the first battle of the Great Limburger Cheese War. This one will cover the last one. The right to mail Limburger cheese had been established, but the Postmaster at Port Washington took exception to Postmaster Burkhard's claim that Limburger and beer was the best snack in the world. Real he-men ate smoked whitefish and beer, which just happened to be a Port Washington specialty. Only a wife-beating sissy who bet against the Green Bay Packers would eat cheese and beer, he suggested. Now, them's fighting words in Wisconsin, where the Holy Trinity has long since been rewritten as "The Father, the Son and the Green Bay Packers." Once again, Burkhard picked up the gauntlet. He challenged his opponent to another duel to solve the burning issue: Which has the better snack with beer? The American Legion Hall in Beaver Dam was selected as the neutral site for the impending battle. About 70 of Monroe's leading citizens made the journey to Beaver Dam. They were well armed for a lengthy struggle, with wheels of Limburger cheese, kegs of beer, and a Swiss dance band. The citizens from Port Washington were equally well armed with smoked whitefish and beer. And, in the finest tradition of American political warfare, the Fish Party bought a round of drinks for the judges, claiming it was a friendly gesture and not designed to affect their decision. Naturally, the Cheese Party ordered two rounds while making the same disclaimer. To be fair and unbiased, the judged accepted another round from the Fish Party. Then the judging began. The judges had a slice of Limburger and a mug of beer. Them a mug of beer with smoked whitefish. Great decisions should not be rushed, so they repeated the whole process, again and again. The judging continued until all the cheese and whitefish were gone, the kegs were empty, and the judges were full. They huddled to vote, then chose a spokesman to announce their verdict. Some unkind visitors have suggested that he was not chosen for his oratorical ability, but because he was the only judge left who could stagger to the microphone. Whatever his shortcomings, he announced a decision that would turn Solomon green with envy. "The judgeth have reached a dethision. It was unamus... unanus..." He stopped, struggling with "unanimous," and continued, "They all said the same darned thang! Cheese'n beer s'wunnerful. Fish and beer s'wunnerful too. But when you have Limburger cheese and smoked whitefish and beer, heck, it don't get no better'n that. It's PERFECT." Thus ended the Great Limburger Cheese War. It was the strangest war ever fought on American soil. It was the perfect war. No one died. The only casualties were skull-splitting hangovers, and both sides thought they won. Green County is equally famous for its Swiss cheese. It answers the age-old complaint, "Can't we have something different for breakfast?" Try this Swiss Cheese Egg Bake. INGREDIENTS: 6 hard-boiled eggs, sliced 1 and a half cups Swiss cheese, shredded 1 10 and a half ounce can condensed cream of chicken soup 3/4 of a cup milk 1/2 teaspoon dry mustard 6 round slices French baguette, buttered PREPARATION: Reserve 6 egg slices for garnish. Place remainder in Casserole. Sprinkle cheese over eggs. Mix soup, milk, and mustard in small pan; heat, stirring until smooth. Pour over egg slices, top with bread slices - buttered side up. Bake at 350 degrees for 35 minutes; garnish with reserved egg slices; dust with paprika and serve. Jeff Cheek lives in Medford. Email your... Technical questions & comments to: WebMaster Daily Tidings editorial comments & questions to: Editor Visit our other Oregon Newspapers... | Albany Democrat-Herald | Ashland Daily Tidings | Corvallis Gazette-Times | | Lebanon Express | Newport News-Times | Springfield News | Cottage Grove Sentinel | Ashland Daily Tidings 1661 Siskiyou Blvd. Ashland, OR 97520 Telephone 541-482-3456 © Copyright 2001 Lee Northwest Publishing