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Clive McFarlane: Parents understand that black children in America face different reality Comment By Clive McFarlane The Telegram & Gazette MailTribune.com By Clive McFarlane The Telegram & Gazette Posted Sep. 11, 2015 at 9:00 AM By Clive McFarlane The Telegram & Gazette Posted Sep. 11, 2015 at 9:00 AM » Social News Earlier this week, a judge threw out the case of an Ohio lesbian couple who had sued a sperm bank for delivering them a biracial daughter instead of the blond, blue-eyed white child they had ordered. The couple, to whom the sperm bank had mistakenly given the inventory of a black donor, has been much maligned for what many viewed as their racist attitude in treating their beautiful 3-year-old daughter Payton as a “wrongful birth.” But calling this couple racist is a colossal misunderstanding of the essential argument of their case — that in providing them with a black man’s sperm, rather than that of a white man, the sperm bank had assigned them to a life of “pain, suffering, emotional distress and other economic and noneconomic losses.” Now, ordinarily, those outcomes are sometimes par for the course for most parents. The difference here is that the Ohio couple, Jennifer Cramblett and Amanda Zinkon, argued that the pain, suffering, emotional distress and economic losses that often come in having and raising children are guaranteed and heightened when the child is black. In throwing out the case, the court agreed with the defendant’s lawyers that “ ‘wrongful birth’ cases are meant to address cases where medical testing was negligent and failed to show risks of congenital or hereditary disorders to a child before birth.” The court, however, failed to address, or perhaps judiciously avoided addressing, the couple’s contention that congenital or hereditary “birth defects” can also include society-assigned psychological stigmas, or in their case, the argument that black children born in this country carry with them a de facto society-assigned birth defect. In their lawsuit, the couple contended that since they were living in a predominantly white community, they fear their daughter would grow up feeling like an outcast. “Jennifer admits that she was raised around stereotypical attitudes about people other than those in her all-white environment. Family members, one uncle in particular, speak openly and derisively about persons of color,” the suit said. “One of Jennifer’s biggest fears is the life experiences Payton will undergo, not only in her all-white community, but in her all-white, and often unconsciously insensitive, family. “Jennifer’s stress and anxiety intensify when she envisions Payton entering an all-white school. Ironically, Jennifer and Amanda moved to Uniontown from a racially diverse Akron, because the schools were better and closer to family. “Jennifer is well aware of the child psychology research and literature correlating intolerance and racism with reduced academic and psychological well-being of biracial child.” I don’t believe Jennifer’s fears about raising her daughter in a white world make her a racist. She said she loves her biracial child dearly. Sure, the extent of her love might be questioned by those who believe a mother’s love should have no bounds. And some might suggest that her primary responsibility at this point is to help her daughter rise above the challenges in her life. I would suggest that most parents, black and white, subscribe to both of these parental pillars of childrearing. This, however, does not invalidate Jennifer’s fear of the racial gauntlet she believes her daughter must confront and overcome, if the child is to have a successful life. And essentially, she is saying in her suit that she would not willingly choose an African-American life experience for her daughter and for herself as a mother, not because she is racist, but because, to her, raising a biracial child means living every day “with fears, anxieties and uncertainty about her future and Payton’s future.” These same fears, when uttered by Black Lives Matter activists, have only increased the angst, bitterness and rhetorical retribution among some white and black Americans who see nothing wrong with the status quo, or who believe that African-Americans are largely to blame for their desperate plight. Jennifer’s story, however, stands as a powerful amicus curiae (friend of the court brief) to the case the Black Lives Matter campaign is waging. By Clive McFarlane The Telegram & Gazette MailTribune.com By Clive McFarlane The Telegram & Gazette Posted Sep. 11, 2015 at 9:00 AM » Comment or view comments Reader Reaction » STAY INFORMED Email NewsLetter Sign Up Today Sign up for our newsletter and have the top headlines from your community delivered right to your inbox. Southern Oregon Directory Featured Businesses Loading... 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