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Oregon Road Conditions & Cams Email Story to a Friend April 15, 2006 ‘My whole family was gone’ Medford man loses his mom, wife and two children in an Arizona highway crash By CHRIS CONRAD Mail Tribune When police appear at your door at 3 a.m. it usually means one of two things: You’re going to jail, or you’re about to hear the worst news of your life. For 20-year-old T.J. Nelson, it was the latter. "When the cop told me to sit down, I felt my heart stop and my whole body went cold," said the Medford resident. "I jumped up and started asking questions, and they told me to sit down again. Then they told me there was an accident. My whole family was gone." The accident happened Monday on Interstate 40, just east of Kingman, Ariz. Tabitha Nelson and her two children, three-year-old Damion and Angelina, who would’ve turned two in June, were passengers in a van driven by T.J.’s mother Janice Hard. Hard, 50, had picked up the Nelsons from Lawton, Okla., where they had been living with relatives since last fall. Tabitha and T.J. were estranged, but had patched things up enough that she was willing to return to Medford to be reunited with her husband. In fact, they were talking about the homecoming on a cell phone moments before a car driven by Paul Ray Herrera, 35, of Kingman, struck their van head-on. Herrera was driving the wrong way down the interstate, police said. Advertisement "The last thing my wife said to me was, ‘Mom’s passing a semi,’ " Nelson said. After the phone went dead he tried to call back, but gave up thinking they had lost the signal. Still rocked with shock and grief following the early-morning police visit, Nelson picked up the Mail Tribune and read the six-inch story detailing his family’s death. It seemed so cold and impersonal, he thought. Just names, dates and a location. Worse, a quote from an Arizona highway patrolman mentioned the fiery explosion that engulfed both vehicles — an image that continues to shake him. The couple met in Oklahoma after moving there from opposite coasts. Tabitha came from Virginia, T.J. from Southern Oregon. They were 16 years old when Damion was born. They married two years later on Dec. 16, 2003, the same year Tabitha birthed Angelina. "It’s hard being married at a young age," Nelson said. "You have so much to learn." Nelson is not shy about admitting his troubled past. Getting back together with Tabitha hinged on his staying out of trouble with the law, he said. Tabitha’s return was meant to signify a turning point in his life. He was ready to take the next step as a family man. Now? "Where can you go?" he asked. "How can you move on? Those are the things you hold closest as a man — your wife and children. How can you take another step without seeing your son smile again, or continue without your wife or mother?" Janice Hard left behind four sons, eight grandchildren and a husband. Elisa Reed, T.J.’s sister-in-law, described her as a giving woman, dedicated to her family and friends. "The last thing she did was help somebody out by picking Tabitha up in Oklahoma," Reed said. Nelson said he and Tabitha spoke about their futures shortly before her death. She told him she eventually wanted to move to Eugene for a fresh start. "I know sooner or later I’m going to have to start moving forward with my life, but right now that’s the last thing on my mind," he said. Reach reporter Chris Conrad at 776-4471, or e-mail �My whole family was gone� ">[email protected] . Mail Tribune Home | Local News | Sports | Business | Obituaries | Life | Opinion AP News | Archives | Site Map | Community | Classified Copyright © 1997-2006 Mail Tribune, Inc. All rights reserved. Privacy Policy | Terms & Conditions | Website Feedback www.bingo.com Home Security Systems Trunks, Footlocker Custom Build Computers Computer Security Discount Hotel Reservations online casinos news Send Flowers California Casinos GMAT Prep Windermere Van Vleet Deep Muscle Stimulator Sports Equipment Online Casino Reviews Hammocks Online Bingo Entertainment Guide Online Casino Fundraisers Sudoku Online Casinos Canada Email Security Advertisement s Advertisement