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Healthy Aging: Ageism distorts our view of getting older Sunday Nov 6, 2016 at 12:01 AM By Sharon Johnson for the Mail Tribune The words and ideas in the following paragraphs came from three sources: a former U.S. president, the 60-something author of “This Chair Rocks,” Ashton Applewhite, and my 3-year-old grandson. If you’re reading this column, it’s entirely likely you have “more yesterdays than tomorrows.” That phrase was used in a speech given at the 2016 Democratic National Convention, and I simply cannot get it out of my mind. It is one of those admissions that should be delightfully acknowledged to spur vibrant conversation between age peers. In your experience, does that happen? I have stories, and you may also have some. One story is about an older woman who is in such denial about her own aging process that she introduces her grandchildren as her children. There’s another about a woman who is regularly contacted by the fraud department at her bank because she’s using different birthdates. Perhaps you know someone who raises a flattened hand toward you in a “back-off” mode if you even bring up the topic of getting older. Or someone who seems to relish repeating, “Getting old is not for sissies,” usually followed by a big sigh. We talk a lot about all the “isms” (racism, sexism, etc.) but not enough about ageism. Like all the other “isms,” dealing with the challenge begins by looking it in the eye and understanding what it is. Ageism can be described as “a tendency to regard older persons as debilitated, unworthy of attention or unsuitable for employment.” It can also be described as “having negative reactions and prejudice toward people who are older.” Do you do that or feel that? Do you recognize that as an ingrained attitude in our society? Sometimes it’s referred to as simple denial and sometimes, more powerfully, as age-shame. The underlying message is that as you get older, you lose value. And to that I shout, “Pshaw.” Think about it. And then think about this: “The appearance of the bull changes when you enter the ring.” That was a phrase used in a recent presentation by the aforementioned author, and that, too, is sticking in my mind. It could be followed by the phrase, “If you have seen one 80-year-old, you have seen one 80-year-old.” The responsibility we each have is to help redefine “old.” We need to model and talk about and demonstrate that “old” has value, wisdom and strength. There should be no such thing as “age appropriate.” Here’s one comment I heard recently to diffuse the presence of ageism and ignite more lighthearted and enlightened conversation. An older man says, “My knee hurts. I’m 67 years old, you know.” And his friend responds, “Does your other knee hurt? It’s just as old.” Or how about the comment by made by my toddler grandson. “Do you want to play with me, Nana? Do you want to go to the park and swing?” My answer is an emphatic, “Yes!” — Sharon Johnson is a retired Oregon State University associate professor. Reach her at [email protected].